Why do we cry? Does crying help us to express our pent-up emotions of sorrow, regret, rage, or happiness? Does it provide us with an outlet to vent ourselves? Why do we cry?
Do emotions do anything for us? Can they help us make sane decisions? No. Practically every single emotion that we experience hinders our thought process. They only make things harder on us. But if that is the case, why do we feel?
I haven't cried much in the past. (Hell, at most, I probably only cried once every year or something. O.o) But of course, things change as time goes by and unfortunately, I am not immune to time's weathering capabilities. As time went on, it chipped away at me every single day, wearing down those walls I built as a child. Then the impossible happened: I just completely broke down and bawled my eyes dry. I don't know why I cried, I just did This came to me as a surprise for two reasons: one is the fact that I was crying and the other was that I was crying.
The thing about crying is that you don't always know when you're going to cry. (Most people don't anyway.) But the thing that gets me the most about this whole...for lack of a better word, thing, is that I don't know why I cried. Most people know why they cry. They cry because somebody betrayed them or because they're mad, sad, or glad. To cry without a reason is just so puzzling to me. I wasn't crying for those things; nobody crossed me, nobody made me feel angry, I wasn't sad or happy. I cried for my heart.
...
The strangest thing happened to me today...
I was going over ticket orders a while ago and I realized that she was going by herself. She only asked for one ticket so I asked her "are you sure none of your family can come with you?" She said that she was sure that no one else was coming. I was kind of upset because I didn't want her sitting in the audience by herself, so I voiced my thoughts on this. Then she told me that maybe she should just go next time when someone could go with her. At first, I didn't understand, but that was probably because I did know what she meant, I just couldn't-no, wouldn't- believe it. (o.O) Of course, she meant no harm by this at all, and yet, it struck down the last bit of wall that time didn't wear away.
Perhaps it was the selfish side of me that still wanted her to go, regardless of company or not, or maybe it wasn't. Yet I just stared at the words on the screen in disbelief. I mean, it wasn't like I could tell her to go even though I really wanted her to. Besides, I knew it wouldn't be proper to coerce someone into doing anything anyways, so I just left it at that.
I knew I couldn't tell her to go. I knew that down to the last fiber of my being, but some part of me just felt so cold because she wasn't going. Why was I feeling so sad over so small a thing? It wasn't that big of a deal, and yet there I was, watching little droplets fall from my eyes onto my desk. I couldn't take it anymore so I excused myself and bolted to my room. Why was this happening to me? She didn't mean any harm by saying that. If anything, she was trying to spare me from it by not having me worry about the fact that she would have attended the function by herself. But why? Why couldn't I accept that? Why couldn't I just let go of it? Why was I letting it consume me as I hid in shame from the world in my room?
What the hell is wrong with me?
Do emotions do anything for us? Can they help us make sane decisions? No. Practically every single emotion that we experience hinders our thought process. They only make things harder on us. But if that is the case, why do we feel?
I haven't cried much in the past. (Hell, at most, I probably only cried once every year or something. O.o) But of course, things change as time goes by and unfortunately, I am not immune to time's weathering capabilities. As time went on, it chipped away at me every single day, wearing down those walls I built as a child. Then the impossible happened: I just completely broke down and bawled my eyes dry. I don't know why I cried, I just did This came to me as a surprise for two reasons: one is the fact that I was crying and the other was that I was crying.
The thing about crying is that you don't always know when you're going to cry. (Most people don't anyway.) But the thing that gets me the most about this whole...for lack of a better word, thing, is that I don't know why I cried. Most people know why they cry. They cry because somebody betrayed them or because they're mad, sad, or glad. To cry without a reason is just so puzzling to me. I wasn't crying for those things; nobody crossed me, nobody made me feel angry, I wasn't sad or happy. I cried for my heart.
...
The strangest thing happened to me today...
I was going over ticket orders a while ago and I realized that she was going by herself. She only asked for one ticket so I asked her "are you sure none of your family can come with you?" She said that she was sure that no one else was coming. I was kind of upset because I didn't want her sitting in the audience by herself, so I voiced my thoughts on this. Then she told me that maybe she should just go next time when someone could go with her. At first, I didn't understand, but that was probably because I did know what she meant, I just couldn't-no, wouldn't- believe it. (o.O) Of course, she meant no harm by this at all, and yet, it struck down the last bit of wall that time didn't wear away.
Perhaps it was the selfish side of me that still wanted her to go, regardless of company or not, or maybe it wasn't. Yet I just stared at the words on the screen in disbelief. I mean, it wasn't like I could tell her to go even though I really wanted her to. Besides, I knew it wouldn't be proper to coerce someone into doing anything anyways, so I just left it at that.
I knew I couldn't tell her to go. I knew that down to the last fiber of my being, but some part of me just felt so cold because she wasn't going. Why was I feeling so sad over so small a thing? It wasn't that big of a deal, and yet there I was, watching little droplets fall from my eyes onto my desk. I couldn't take it anymore so I excused myself and bolted to my room. Why was this happening to me? She didn't mean any harm by saying that. If anything, she was trying to spare me from it by not having me worry about the fact that she would have attended the function by herself. But why? Why couldn't I accept that? Why couldn't I just let go of it? Why was I letting it consume me as I hid in shame from the world in my room?
What the hell is wrong with me?
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